Seduction and Dating: Starting Conversations, Talking What You Want to Talk About, and How To Do It

Starting conversations isn't rocket surgery, but it can feel like it sometimes.

You're about to get it broken down for you. How to start a conversation with any woman.

The rule that determines what to start talking about is Situational Relevance.

What you start talking about has to be Relevant to the Situation. In bars and nightclubs, the atmosphere is about having fun and socializing. So what you use to start conversing has to be relevant to an atmosphere of having fun and socializing.

If you stalk through a club like a hunter, and ignore everyone, you're not being situationally relevant.

On the other hand, if you see a beautiful woman in the daytime, in a mall for instance. In that case, why are you interrupting her day? You need to present a reason you're talking to them.

If you stop and ask them their opinion on world politics, you're not being situationally relevant. If you're talking to a woman going about her day, specifically to her, you need to do it for a relevant reason.

One thing that's always situationally relevant is a solid compliment. See, I'll share a little secret with you: Women wear interesting and unique pieces of clothing and jewelry as an easy way for observant, confident men to start conversations with them. If she's wearing a unique, cool pair of gold-colored high heels, "Hey, I'm feelin' the heels" is situationally relevant in the daytime.

From there you go into conversation. And guess what? SitRel rules conversation too. Everything you converse about has to be situationally relevant. So if you want to talk about something, you have to bring it up in a way that's SitRel.

A lot of things that are portrayed as cheesey or overplayed are seen like that because men just drop these "lines" out of nowhere. Stuff like "What's your sign?" and "Tell me your dreams." But let's look at "Tell me your dreams", shall we?

How to ask that in a situationally relevant way?

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Situational Relevance in Action:

Start by asking her what she does for a living. She'll answer with her job. Then you ask her, "Is that your dream job? Nine out of ten women will answer no.

From there, you can say, "Oh? What are your dreams then?"

It looks like this:

Pick-Up Artist: So, what do you for a living girl?

Girl: I'm an accountant.

PUA: Oh really? Is that your dream job?

Girl: Not really.

PUA: Oh. What are your dreams then?

That doesn't seem unnatural. With proper delivery and tonality, it goes over really well. She'll get starry-eyed and start talking about her dreams...

and you didn't seem like cheesy wannabe player guy.

If you want to talk about any subject, you can use situational relevance as the bridge to get you there. Let's say you work as a surgeon.

If you say, "I'm a surgeon, a true professional that makes a lot of money and saves lives," you're bragging. Comes across pretty lame.

On the other hand, look at this:

You call up a girl whose number you recently got, Sally.

You: Hey Sally, how's it going?

Sally: Okay. You?

You: Oh... relieved. Barely.

Sally: Why's that?

You: Well, this young kid came into the ER today and his mother was all shaken up. Thank God, he was okay, just had heat stroke. Got some water into him and he was okay.

Now she knows you're a doctor, without you bragging about it. This can be used for anything in any profession.

And speaking of phone numbers, how do you get one in a situationally relevant way?

You NEVER ask for her phone number. You never say, "Can I get your number?" No no no no!

Instead, after you've gotten done talking, you suggest an activity to do together.

Me: Hey, it's been really nice meeting you Jackie.

Jackie: Yeah, Sebastian, I had a great time.

Me: Tell ya what - I'm heading to this cool free concert at the Common next weekend. You should come with.

Jackie: That sounds fun.

Me: Cool, let me grab your number.

Then I take my phone out. Getting the number is relevant to meeting next weekend. Or for coffee. Or for whatever.

I don't want the number for the number's sake (which wouldn't be situationally relevant). Instead she agrees to a fun activity with me, and of course we need each other's numbers to finish making plans.

That's Situational Relevance in action. Everything you do needs to be situationally relevant. How you start a conversation, the things you tell her, the things you ask her, and how you get her number or keep the conversation going. If you can master situational relevance, you can talk with women anywhere no problem.